Hereby perceive we the love of God, because he laid down his life for us: and we ought to lay down our lives for the brethren.
1 John 3,16

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Two ways and the struggle for my soul

Štefan Patrik Kováč

You´re in the army and the enemy is prepared – and you?Let him not take you by surprise.How can you fight in the best way? That you die first and you´ll let Christ Commander and King fight within you.Then you can´t loose.You can loose single battles when you aren´t perfect but the final victory is yours.However, it´s an everyday dying to yourself and getting up with Jesus. Two ways and the struggle for my soul

My friends know that I spent the summer of jubelee year 2000 in the community in England (The House of the Open door, HOD).I experienced a lot of blessing there and God moved me forward considerably in the spiritual life.Some of my inner problems were sorted out there and by the power of Jesus Christ´s blood was destroyed the root of my sins.In addition to it, I went away with the new heart.Luke Heath, one of the community members received a picture from God on one of the Praise and Worship Friday Night Evening: Jesus uses his sword to cut your heart into two pieces, Steven.The sword is the sign of the God´s word, that is, Holy Spirit.I received these words during the praises: You´ll be in service of my Word.I destroy your heart and I give you a new one.You´ll be the servant of my word.It´ll be painful but if you hold out on you´ll get what I´ve promised.In a nutshell, God wanted me very badly to stay in the community.He wanted to bless me in this sacred place – that is wherever brothers live in love.God wanted me to be there.

Nevertheless, I got another offer that was very tempting and seductive.When I came from London to Evesham ( the journey from Slovakia took 22 hours ) that is the nearest bigger town by the village Childswick where resides the community and I stood in the square with the bag in my hand wanting to phone HOD to pick me up, the owner of the nearby pizza parlour offered me a free call from his cellular phone.When I came in, I talked about various issues and I was given the opportunity to work – illegally.Board and lodging for free.I´d sleep upstairs and work downstairs in pizza parlour and get  very very good wages.Apart from this, I was pressed for money at that time.“That´s great“.I said to myself.“What an opportunity!“Instead of going to HOD – I´ll go working to the pizza parlour and nobody´ll know about me?! I´ll make some money and return home rolling in money.What an opportunity! I started considering and thinking about it and counting money….

No, I didn´t.Then, the Spirit showed me that it´d have been the betrayal of Christ whom I´d had to believe since the very beginning.He wanted me to be in the community and teach me and endow me.I had to believe that he´d lead me here because he had his plan with me.It was a test.When I left HOD at the end of August, I knew it for sure what it´d been at the beginning: it was a temptation from Evil who wanted to prevent the blessing from coming into my life and I had choice.
And it´s always this way.There are always two ways.If Jesus prepares the way of blessing for you, The One who divides is there immediately so that he can lead you away to his path.He´ll paint a rosy picture of it ( You´ll make money, Steven!) and claim that it´s more attractive ( God´s way is so boring after all but here with me you´ll have great lark ) and he´ll insinuate how to belittle the betrayal of Jesus when you´d pledged yourself to follow only his path ( it´s a temporal turn Jesus will wait! ) and he´ll say his way is more sensible ( On what do you mean to live? It´s neccessary to make your living so, go working to the pizza parlour!)Then, only your faith counts:How much do you trust Jesus? How do you abide by your decision to follow Master and be his disciple.Do you believe that Jesus can give you the best thing?Or you´ll “suspend temporarily your decision about following your Master unconditionally?“.
It´s the choice that nobody else can take.
The spiritual fight.And one more thing: If the Holy Spirit comes and takes your life, be ready for the attacks of Evil.He doesn´t offer only two ways but he attacks you directly.He wants to take away lots of things from you.What things are you able to sacrifice for the Lord? Are you able to say together with Paul:for Christ I´ve suffered the loss of all things, and do count them but dung, that I may win Christ.( Phil. 3:8b ).The enemy is interested more in you.You harm him more.When you accept the God´s Spirit you´re a part of the Christ´s army.If you don´t accept and if you don´t let Jesus be the Lord of your life and don´t give him your life then, you don´t harm him then, he doesn´t notice you much because you are half his and you are harmless.Here on earth, it´s only a poor reflection of that war in the heaven – you don´t fight against flesh and blood but higher powers.That´s why you must belong to the Army, otherwise you´re lost on your own.
You´re a soldier.You can either fight or desert.Do you want to desert or fight? Wait for the attacks of the Evil.Be ready.You are in the Army.The enemy is prepared – and you?Let him not take you by surprise.How can you fight in the best way? That you die first and you´ll let Christ Commander and King fight within you,.Then you can´t loose.You can loose single battles when you aren´t perfect but the final victory is yours.However, it´s an everyday dying to yourself and getting up with Jesus.
Don´t be afraid.Christ is with you and he is the head of the Christians´ army.He gives you the strongest arms (EF 6 ) ….Have your loins girt about with truth ( don´t do any small compromises with the lie and deception as then your Enemy knows your foibles and his arrow can strike you ).Have on the breastplate of righteousness ( throw away your righteousness and put on Jesus´s one – it´s done through repentance and regret over your mistakes.Jesus will dress you with his breastplate that can´t be penetrated by any shell or bullet ).And your feet shod with the preparation of the gospel of peace ( it´s a strong arm through which you show you aren´t afraid.You´ll stand firmly and the footwear like this isn´t slippery nobody will trip you…..And put also the shield of faith among your weapons because it´s exactly it that parries the Satan´s arrows of doubts.You always need your shield in order to protect your throat, hands and other parts of your body that aren´t protected by the breastplate.Protect it and think of it all the time – never forget to bring it along into the battle because if you don´t have or loose this weapon, you´ll gradually loose all the others.You also have the helmet of salvation at your disposal that can protect your head and your thoughts through which the Evil attacks.If you take your salvation from Jesus survive it and you´ll follow it , so you´re saved.And then, the sword of the Spirit which is the word of God.You needn´t only defend yourself but you can go on the offensive.
Isn´t it fantastic to be the member of such a strong Army? Jesus Christ is the general.

                                                                                        Štefan Patrik Kováč, December 2007



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